Check Up

Earlier this week, my sweet baby girl had her four month pediatrician visit. We were told that she is perfect and healthy. So, we must be doing something right! 

She had another round of shots, one in each leg. It was hard for me, again, to see her in pain and crying, but daddy was there and calmed her down in under a minute! 

She now weighs 13 pounds, 6 ounces, and is 25 inches long. My tall, thin girl!

She is grabbing and grasping more and more at things, and loves snuggling with silky edges on blankets. She wants EVERYTHING in her mouth, and if it's not a toy or her paci, its her hands. It's pretty funny when she tries to shove her entire hand or fist into her mouth...
She loves looking at pictures of Michael and I. It's so sweet - she just stares at them and smiles. So I made a little photo book for her! And, I discovered that Evelyn is very ticklish and loves to giggle! The other day, she laughed the longest laughs that I have ever heard come from her! She LOVES buzzing her lips/blowing air through her lips. She does it on the changing table, when she wakes up, through her paci, and when she's falling asleep. She is always full of smiles, all day long! And she doesn't want to miss a beat - lately, when we eat out, she is not content being in her car seat. So she usually ends up sitting in my lap as I eat. Soon, when she's able to sit up, she'll be able to join us at the table in a highchair, and I think she will be so happy about that! In my last update, I said that she hadn't been napping at all. Well, that has changed! She takes a couple hour long naps now, which is a huge improvement. But she still won't nap in the crib - she prefers her swing or my arms.
Evelyn is such a happy baby ( when she's not hungry or tired!)

And she is now cuter than ever. See for yourself...

All dressed up

Yesterday, we went on her first "big girl" walk, front-facing, not in the car seat! 

She loved it. 

Sweet Smiles

Isn't she amazingly beautiful???

Shutterfly

I just wanted to quickly share with you a new product (new to me) that I absolutely love. 

I had been wanting to print and scrapbook all of my pregnancy, birth, and newborn photos. As a new mommy, I honestly do not have the time or energy to do it! So I came to the sad realization that it probably would never get done. 

Until I remembered Shutterfly.com! I uploaded all of my photos to their website, edited, captioned, designed everything, and ordered the photo books. And I love the way they turned out. They are pretty affordable, compared to the cost of buying a photo album, printing off all of the photos, and buying all of the scrapbooking accessories, not to mention all of the time it would take to scrapbook. All I had to do was sit at the computer, and it would save all of the progress I made, so I was able to do it over the course of a few weeks. The quality was really good, with thick pages and a hardcover. And, none of the pictures looked pixilated, no matter how big I made them. They seems to run free shipping regularly, and  I was able to find coupon codes for extra discounts! 

And, all of our professional photos taken by Amick Cutler Photography looked gorgeous in the books!

  

The first book is all of the pregnancy photos, and the second book is the birth and newborn photos. 

I will definitely be making more, as Evelyn grows!

Happy scrapping - or should I say - shutterflying! 

The Land Between

It's been some time since I've written about spiritual life. I in no way want to compartmentalize my life and put things into boxes, like "baby", "marriage", "God", etc, because ultimately, those things are all intertwined, are weaved into my every day, and are a part of every post that I write.

But I think it's time for a gut check, for me to be honest with myself, for me to be transparent about what God is doing and how He is working. I always have to remind myself that the way God is working in my life could make an impact in someone else's life. And hey, isn't that what it's all about?

Several weeks ago, I sat down for lunch with my dear friend. I expressed to her that I am in a place that is uncomfortable. I'm having a hard time seeing the horizon, seeing what God has for me. I know where I've come from, but I honestly do not know where I am going. Have you ever been there? I know God is leading us, but where? What is it going to look like? I feel like He is making all things new. We are on this journey that is our own, and right now, we are in the land between where we clearly came from to the unknown. We are in a time of transition where at times it is difficult to hear His voice, see His direction, and understand what is to come. We are in a land between. My friend told me that they were starting a small group centered around the topic "The Land Between," based on a book of the same title. It was no coincidence. 

I am in a new season, where I am really struggling with my identity. I've walked away from ministries that I previously poured everything into. I am now a mommy. We are a family. What does that mean for us? Who are we going to become? Where is God leading? He's leading us as a family now, and that is incredibly new for us. 

I have a terribly difficult time even articulating what is going on...

But the land between is fertile ground for God to plant seeds for things to come. 

And in this fertile ground, God is showing me many things, convicting me, moving me, and causing me to take an honest look...

He is showing me that I love Him, but am I in love with Him? There is a huge difference.

I believe in God, but do I believe Him? Again, huge difference.

I've allowed the enemy to whisper lies to me. My thought life is in need of an emergency room. The enemy knows our weaknesses, and he kicks us when we are down.

And how can I expect change and expect God to move when my flesh takes over? There is a constant battle between the spiritual and the flesh, and honestly, my flesh does not want to spend time with Him. My flesh doesn't want to pray, it doesn't want to read His word. 

And another big thing that God has revealed in this land between?

I've used ministry and serving as my crutch. I faithfully served every week, and that was becoming my god. I told myself "I put in my time this week, served Him, worshipped Him, connected with Him on an emotional level, tried to create and conjure up some sort of encounter with Him, so that means God and I are good - our relationship is great!" But it wasn't until I was told to walk away from those ministries and serving that God revealed that to me. And it is a painful reality. Now I am left standing here with no ministry, no form of service to use as a crutch. It's just me and God. I can clearly see how my relationship with Him really is, at it's core. And it hurts. 

So that is a small glimpse into where I am at. I did my best to articulate and explain, but I am still being shown these things...

This is my land between.