Shutterfly

I just wanted to quickly share with you a new product (new to me) that I absolutely love. 

I had been wanting to print and scrapbook all of my pregnancy, birth, and newborn photos. As a new mommy, I honestly do not have the time or energy to do it! So I came to the sad realization that it probably would never get done. 

Until I remembered Shutterfly.com! I uploaded all of my photos to their website, edited, captioned, designed everything, and ordered the photo books. And I love the way they turned out. They are pretty affordable, compared to the cost of buying a photo album, printing off all of the photos, and buying all of the scrapbooking accessories, not to mention all of the time it would take to scrapbook. All I had to do was sit at the computer, and it would save all of the progress I made, so I was able to do it over the course of a few weeks. The quality was really good, with thick pages and a hardcover. And, none of the pictures looked pixilated, no matter how big I made them. They seems to run free shipping regularly, and  I was able to find coupon codes for extra discounts! 

And, all of our professional photos taken by Amick Cutler Photography looked gorgeous in the books!

  

The first book is all of the pregnancy photos, and the second book is the birth and newborn photos. 

I will definitely be making more, as Evelyn grows!

Happy scrapping - or should I say - shutterflying! 

The Land Between

It's been some time since I've written about spiritual life. I in no way want to compartmentalize my life and put things into boxes, like "baby", "marriage", "God", etc, because ultimately, those things are all intertwined, are weaved into my every day, and are a part of every post that I write.

But I think it's time for a gut check, for me to be honest with myself, for me to be transparent about what God is doing and how He is working. I always have to remind myself that the way God is working in my life could make an impact in someone else's life. And hey, isn't that what it's all about?

Several weeks ago, I sat down for lunch with my dear friend. I expressed to her that I am in a place that is uncomfortable. I'm having a hard time seeing the horizon, seeing what God has for me. I know where I've come from, but I honestly do not know where I am going. Have you ever been there? I know God is leading us, but where? What is it going to look like? I feel like He is making all things new. We are on this journey that is our own, and right now, we are in the land between where we clearly came from to the unknown. We are in a time of transition where at times it is difficult to hear His voice, see His direction, and understand what is to come. We are in a land between. My friend told me that they were starting a small group centered around the topic "The Land Between," based on a book of the same title. It was no coincidence. 

I am in a new season, where I am really struggling with my identity. I've walked away from ministries that I previously poured everything into. I am now a mommy. We are a family. What does that mean for us? Who are we going to become? Where is God leading? He's leading us as a family now, and that is incredibly new for us. 

I have a terribly difficult time even articulating what is going on...

But the land between is fertile ground for God to plant seeds for things to come. 

And in this fertile ground, God is showing me many things, convicting me, moving me, and causing me to take an honest look...

He is showing me that I love Him, but am I in love with Him? There is a huge difference.

I believe in God, but do I believe Him? Again, huge difference.

I've allowed the enemy to whisper lies to me. My thought life is in need of an emergency room. The enemy knows our weaknesses, and he kicks us when we are down.

And how can I expect change and expect God to move when my flesh takes over? There is a constant battle between the spiritual and the flesh, and honestly, my flesh does not want to spend time with Him. My flesh doesn't want to pray, it doesn't want to read His word. 

And another big thing that God has revealed in this land between?

I've used ministry and serving as my crutch. I faithfully served every week, and that was becoming my god. I told myself "I put in my time this week, served Him, worshipped Him, connected with Him on an emotional level, tried to create and conjure up some sort of encounter with Him, so that means God and I are good - our relationship is great!" But it wasn't until I was told to walk away from those ministries and serving that God revealed that to me. And it is a painful reality. Now I am left standing here with no ministry, no form of service to use as a crutch. It's just me and God. I can clearly see how my relationship with Him really is, at it's core. And it hurts. 

So that is a small glimpse into where I am at. I did my best to articulate and explain, but I am still being shown these things...

This is my land between. 

Counting Weeks

If one counts weeks, it has been sixteen weeks today since Evelyn was born. That means she is four months old! Goodness, how time doesn't slow down. At all.

So, now that I am coming to terms with the fact that I have a four month old (really???), I will share some of her latest and greatest...

Her hair is growing in (as mine is falling out from post-preggers hormones). And it is so beautiful. It is still that strawberry blonde color!

We are still happily and successfully breastfeeding. 

She's got little rolls on her thighs and the cutest dimples in her butt!

She has discovered her voice. And she is a chatty girl! She "talks" all day long! She's discovered that she can be loud, and that her voice can go up high. It is adorable!

Evelyn loves her fingers! They are constantly in her mouth, if her paci isn't in it.

Some of her favorite things - the paci, Albert the frog, and Ollie the octopus. 

She is so kissable!!!!!

When she nurses, she will stop, turns her head, and starts talking to me. Then she turns her head back and starts nursing again. It is one of the cutest things ever. 

She loves to stand.

Evelyn is not good at naps. Since she was born, she only takes quick 10 minute cat naps here and there. And lately, the cat naps have not even been happening. She doesn't want to miss a thing! It makes for one tired mommy, though.

She is so stinkin cute. I know I'm a little biased, okay, a lot biased, but you have to admit that she is one of the cutest babies ever.

She loves loud music.

She already is scared of strangers, and just wants her mommy. When random people approach her and talk to her, she sticks out her bottom lip and starts to cry, like she is scared. 

And finally,

She is the light of my life. A precious gift from the Lord. And I am thankful.

Back to Work...

I've been back to work now for a month. 

And I don't like it.

Keep in mind that I only work two days a week.

The first morning that I worked and dropped her off at Grammie and Grampie's was horrible. I cried, more like sobbed, the entire way to work.

It has been good for me in a sense, that I am able to get out of the house.

But I really don't like it.

I have a new and huge appreciation for mommies who do it full time. It is hard enough for me doing two days a week, I can't imagine doing it five days a week. So working-full-time-mommy, I salute you and have a whole new respect for you.

Maybe when she's older it will be easier to leave her, but for now, it is very difficult.

I know my calling is to be a stay at home mommy (at least during these early years), so I am going to do everything in my power to make that happen.

It's just really hard when I am with all of these other children all day, when I know I could be at home with mine. 

And the pumping, cleaning bottles, packing her things, it's just a lot of hassle for a teeny tiny paycheck. 

I'm going to finish out the rest of the school year, and I'm going to finish strong. God has me here for a reason, and I need to keep reminding myself of that. But come fall...

I just don't want to miss a single moment with my sweet Evelyn. I want to have no regrets as she grows, and as our future children join our family. 

I really just want to follow God's plan, because He ultimately knows what's best and will lead us in the decision that is right for us. 

Road Trip!

This past week, we took our first family road trip. Michael had some business to do for work in Atlanta, so we decided to go along and spend a weekend there. 

I was amazed at all of the things we had to bring along. This was our first trip with Evelyn! 

We rented a minivan, loaded it up, and we were off!

Evelyn did great on the five hour drive. We only had to stop once to feed her, and she slept most of the way. 

We got to our hotel in Buckhead, Atlanta, and crashed. 

Daddy had to work the next day, so Evelyn and I had some relaxing time together in the hotel. We eventually ventured out on our own, going out to lunch and doing a little shopping.

Silly, sleepy girl!

Michael only had to work on Friday, so Saturday, Sunday, and Monday were ours to explore together!

We headed to the Georgia Aquarium, which is the largest aquarium in America. I loved every minute of it! Evelyn did too. She was so alert that we put her in the Bjorn so she could see everything. And she loved watching all of the fish, sea creatures, and dolphins!

After the aquarium, we went across the street to The World of Coke. Since Coke is the drink of choice in our house (for Michael - I prefer water), we had a lot of fun there. All the coke you could ever want to drink was at our disposal. Mmmm....but I drank TOO much and had a belly ache!

I was excited to sit on the American Idol couch. Remember when they used to use that? I think it was several seasons ago. 

She is so cute! Evelyn loves being on the go, so she seemed to really enjoy herself!

We also visited Stone Mountain Park. I had no idea that this even existed, and I was pretty surprised that a place like this was close to Atlanta. It was a huge park with camping, biking, trails, and several chains of lakes. And the really cool part was this huge mountain of granite. Someone at some point decided to carve into the side of the mountain. It was really impressive. 

Because we were staying in the upscale part of Atlanta, we were able to indulge in some incredible restaurants. We went to a French place called Bistro Niko, and it was the fanciest dining I've ever experienced. All of the waiters called us by name (Mr. and Mrs. Swift), and my glass was never empty. Seriously. Every time I took a sip of water, a waiter was there immediately to fill it back up. It was very formal, and I loved it. We also ate at another really cool place called Brick Tops, which was also pretty fancy, and we had Sunday lunch at Maggiano's. 

We decided to visit Lenox Square mall. I had never been to a Tiffany's before, and I really wanted to go and check it out. Audrey Hepburn made it so famous, and I wanted to see what all the fuss was about. We got to this mall, and every store was a brand that you would see on the runway - Jimmy Choo, Valentino, Gucci, etc. It was crazy. Recession? What recession? Let's just say that Atlanta has a lot of wealth. And fancy cars. I've never seen so many Rolls Royce and Bentley cars in one place...

We had a great time, and our first family vacation/roadtrip was successful! It was so good to just get a way for a bit. And Evelyn was so good, too! Good food, good sight seeing, good quality time together.