I am officially out of my first trimester. I "turned" 14 weeks yesterday. I can't believe how fast it went, and if it's any indication as to how fast the rest of the pregnancy will go, I say "slow down!" I had an incredible first trimester, with everything being so new and fascinating. Every day brought new learning experiences and I truly enjoyed every minute of it. I know that I will never have this experience again - a first first trimester! So, I am trying every day to soak it all in. I'm a little sad about leaving the first trimester, but I am excited about the new things to come during the second. Let's just hope it doesn't go so fast!!!
I still am incredibly tired, but I can manage that with an afternoon nap and an early bedtime! My nausea seems to have disappeared for the most part, with a few occasional nauseous moments. Our nursery is coming together - all the furniture has been put together and set up as of last night. Now just on to decorating! To me, my belly seems to be getting larger by the day, but to everyone else, they can't believe that I am 14 weeks and "not showing." I've just been noticing all of those small changes! And, I've gained two pounds total, which puts me at 124. This pleases hubby greatly, and I'm sure Dr. Sontag will be pleased as well. We go in and see him on May 26th for our 16 week check up.
Outside of all of the pregnancy news, our lives have been pretty quiet. I've always been one who loves to be out and about, doing something, but lately, I really have become a homebody. It's not that I don't want to do things, I'm just so exhausted, especially after work, that its hard to actually do the things I want to. I've also been feeling a little lonely - I have to attribute some of this to me being incredibly hormonal. But, our close friends have been very busy with their lives and families, and my parents have been up north for a month, and we don't have any other family down here. We just haven't had a lot of quality time with the ones we love, and I'm finding myself really missing that. I'm missing the deep conversations that we have, the accountability, and the fun. I'm feeling a little insecure about it - hoping it's nothing personal or nothing that I've said or done. I'm trying to not let my feelings and emotions get the best of me. I've always been a "people person," pouring a lot into relationships. I'm praying that this is just a short season. A couple days ago, I was talking to God about this, and being incredibly emotional. I heard His voice clearly say to me that during this season, instead of feeling sorry for myself, invest the extra time that I have in Him, continually digging deeper and deeper, and let Him fill me up and fill that void that I may feel. Let's just say it is a daily work in progress....Work is going well, and summer is just a short 3 weeks away. I'm hoping to announce soon what my work plans are for the fall - things seem to be falling into place, by the grace of God.
I have to share a little from Pastor Josh's sermon from this past Sunday. I'm loving the series that we are in, called "The Kingdom: Life Upside Down." If you get a chance, visit http://www.libertychurch.net/north-campus to listen to the first two in the series. This past Sunday, Josh's first point was "having a proper attitude toward circumstances." My blessings are not contingent on life's circumstances or happiness, regardless of my outward conditions. The blessings of God are more than what is temporary! And no matter what, no matter if things are going well or not, my need for God stays the same. This really spoke to me. Over the past year and a half, I have come to a place with God that I have never been before. I discovered my true need for Him. I prayed and prayed, constantly. I found for myself that I cannot do it without Him. And even now, when I am feeling blessed more than ever and my desperate prayers for a child have been answered, my need for Him stays the same, just as it did when I was in that deep pit of depression and longing. My heart still needs to hurt for Him. My mind still needs to cry out to Him. Because my circumstances have changed, my need and dependence on Him will not change. I am just as needy now as I was 6 months, 12 months, and 18 months ago.
When you have eaten and are satisfied, praise the LORD your God for the good land He has given you. Be careful that you do not forget the LORD your God, failing to observe His commands, His laws and His decrees that I am giving you today. Otherwise, when you eat and are satisfied, when you build fine houses and settle down, and when your herds and flocks grow large and your silver and gold increase and all you have is multiplied, then your heart will become proud and you will forget the LORD your God.
Deuteronomy 8:10-14
Love to you all...
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