A Continual Work

I'm a work in progress. I will always be. Just when I think "Okay, God, I have this figured out and I'm working on it," something else that needs attention becomes extremely evident. And I am okay with that. God continually works in our lives, pruning away the dead branches, growing us into climbing vines. Over the past two years, it feels as if God has been emptying me out, tearing out what I thought I knew about Him, and replacing it with His truth, and what He wants for me. And God is still doing it. I feel as if I am on the threshing floor. As I read back over my blog, I can see how God has been working and teaching, and how I had to come to the end of myself, and truly know what it means to "give it to Him," to pray, read, study. And I am a work in progress. I will never stop learning about surrender, the daily battles that I face will not suddenly come to an end. I still grapple, battle, struggle with my identity, my purpose, His purpose, what this all means. But, through constant study, prayer, and sowing into a true relationship with Him, I am given the ability to make it through, to see God's hand in my life, and to "fight the good fight."

I think some people have the impression that since God gave us our miracle, everything is peachy. That somehow, life is perfect now that God has given us the desires of our heart. I believe that so many times we have misguided thinking that says that if we are given _____, life will be complete and perfect. "If God would only bless us with _____ , then ______ ." Then we would spend our lives chasing after the next thing that we desire, thinking that it will fix everything, fix all of our issues. Only God can fix everything and fill that hole. (I touched on this in a previous post not too long ago.) But I'm here to tell you that God is still doing a major work, which is at times and most days, painful. Don't get me wrong and think that I am not thankful, rejoicing, and in awe of our miracle every day! Every day, throughout the day, my heart is singing His praise. But, no matter what you are given in this life, no matter the blessings that you receive, God will still be working, pruning and trimming. The life of the Christ-follower is filled with mountains and valleys, and just when you've made it to the top of your mountain and can breathe in the fresh air, guess what you see in front of you? Another mountain to climb... But that is where God works. He works in our valleys, He works in our mountains. The blessings that we receive show us God's faithfulness and His glory, and we are to remember those blessings in the good, and especially trying times, so we are a testament to others and to ourselves.

I am still in awe of our miracle. I have not lost that, I never will. I will never forget what we've been through, what we're going through. But I know that God is still working, molding me on the threshing floor. He has brought front and center some incredible insecurities that I have. Satan knows these insecurities, and he has been going on that attack, especially more intensely since God blessed us with our miracle. So I feel like I am dealing with much, sorting through things and seeking Him as things are brought to light. I'm not sure what all this will look like in the end and what changes I will need to make, but I know there will be decisions and changes. He is doing a work, a shifting, a sifting.

I will not run. I will not waiver. I will pray. I will stand firm in Christ - even when these times and seasons and changes are most difficult. 

I will leave you with Philippians 1:6. "He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus." The good work is usually, actually, more like always, paved with heartache and pain, and it is only at the completion will we truly see God's ultimate redemptive plan. Notice that it doesn't say "will carry it on to completion until tomorrow. Or until one year. Or five years. Or until you've given up, or given in, or been through my fair share." It says until the day of Christ Jesus.  The hope lies in "will carry it on to completion," not maybe, perhaps, or probably, but will. Everything will be redeemed. Everything will be restored.